What originally was going to be my typical three hour cleaning session: vacuuming, dusting, surfaces, floors - worthwhile but a bit cosmetic - transformed itself into a monumental overhaul that was long over due. But as I have begun to alter my perspective, my ethos on life, I decided it was time to check off one of the big items on my to do list, so I hunkered down for large chunks of Friday, Saturday and Sunday to clean and organize (and I still have a ways to go). I have begun to gut the house - four buckets of paper and other recyclables so far, two very large trash cans of refuse, articles and teaching stuff organized and filed with tabs, library thinning (first batch of books donated to "Books to Prisoner") and so on.
For one of the first times in a long time, I tackled the hardest tasks first. First stop: the office. Generally a mash of books, music, stacks of paper (see below) - one of the two areas that are hit by my personal storm. But now, my office feels bigger, I found many things I forgot that I had and now know where they are (core articles in the field and essential for dissertation number one on the list of finds). My dining / living area is now clear of clutter, new CD shelves installed so large piles of CDs that were in four different locations are now organized and in place. The kitchen pantry is culled, some food expired and regrettably discarded (but recycled containers when possible and one box for the local food pantry). My cooking area (prep area, cook books) still needs a bit of work. My bedroom no longer has countless issues of Vanity Fair and NME that have slid down the side as I slept. And my bed has new sheets, I love sleeping on new sheets. Clothing has been folded, organized and put back in place so again I know what I have and know where it is (plus another box for the local men's shelter). I have made a partial dent in the guest bedroom but that was the primary staging area for this clean out so it will come last. The bathroom has yet to be touched but other than just regular use, this cleaning is classic bathroom cleaning. I'm not including the basement (a copout, I know).
Much like this blog, these past three days have reinforced my recent efforts to alter, change, adapt my perspective on life, left me sore (I tore a part so much correspondence - junk mail, old mail, old bills, redundant financial crap from the mutual funds that have sucked over the last decade - that my left bicep and forearm a bit sore Monday, not so much today and produced the aforementioned recycling), produced many smiles and laughs (finding cool Holiday cards from kind friends lost at the bottom of the pile, old letters from girlfriends and other friends, postcards from countless spots in the world, photos of nephews and nieces and the dog, a few odd keepsakes from travels to England, Vancouver, Seattle, Panama, Mexico and such), a few cuss words as the overwhelming nature of this clean up took several momentary tolls on my mind, my patience (again see desk photo), a calm that comes from concentrating on a task and working toward completion, and just knowing where things are, what do I have, what do I need?*
How did it get this way? Not really sure that question matters: living alone, limited motivation and energy, and a tragic complacency that clouded my past (both recent and longer). But I am finally under the surface of this past, so while the work goes on, it feels good, not godly, just good.
*As I am in the middle of David Foster Wallace's Brief Interviews with Hideous Men, this long sentence makes total sense as well as the asterisk (this comparison is only regarding length of sentence and use of footnotes - nothing more - because that man can work a sentence, an idea, characters and dialogue, etc.). One of his sentences lasted nearly two pages, I was exhausted wondering how it would end, would it actually end?
I find the major limitation of cleaning is that it exposes the inseparable relationship between winnowing and accumulation.
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